It’s funny looking at these images and reminiscing my first visit back in 2012. Literally 10 years prior, and so much have changed. I feel like a completely different human being.

Scientifically, isn’t it quite true though? We shed our cellular makeup every 7 years? Something like that. (Jokes, this article says it’s not true. Another article here, fascinating.)

But, as I look at these with fresh eyes and a sober heart, I feel utterly in awe at how much mindset can shift. I never imagined that I would be here.

At 22, I was heavily Christian, in the middle of toxic relationships, allowing others and institutions to dictate my way of living, and so, so young. I struggled with insecurities and sought for happiness outside of myself. I don’t blame her for the decisions she’s made; it has brought me to this place after all. I think 22-year-old Patty did her best with what she knew.

Now, a few weeks shy of 32, I find myself refreshed, content, and yet yearning for more. I’ve fallen in love, I’ve had my heart broken multiple times, I’ve started a few businesses, learnt from my mistakes, and solidified a community here in Auckland. I see myself in a new light: I love who I have become, and I revel in my strength, beauty, and courage. I am incredibly loved, fully alive, and healthy.

I genuinely did not imagine that I would be here at 32.

Opera House perspective from the Sydney Harbour Bridge.

I envisioned myself married with kids at 24. And here I am, single, living on my own in a beautiful home that I’ve created, thriving with two successful businesses, and overflowing with friendships, hobbies, movement, and creativity.

And yet, there is so much more. In this season, I want to dive deeper. Into my heritage, my history, my purpose. Yes, I can focus on frivolity and curiosity, and equally, I have been challenged to swim in this river of uncertainty and see where it takes me.

Here goes nothing.

Sydney: Then & Now